Category Archives: Funny Poems

Funny, Pun-filled Poems

POEM: Putin on the Ritz

Putin on the Ritz Putin showed up The end At the gate of heaven Only to discover that God is the kindest woman You could ever imagine Who also turns out To be a huge fan Of Pussy Riot And … Continue reading

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POEM: Got Marxism?

Got Marxism? “Are you a Marxist?” he asked Well Yes and know I am More of a Groucho Marxist Than a Karl Marxist This funny little poem is a bit Zen in that turns a serious question into a playful … Continue reading

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FUNNY POEM: Weight Fore It

In the dark Weight fore it There it is That singular smile Making light Of everything Taking a twinkle Over Awe the whirled As never Settling for number one Even as wading for it On and on As inevitable As … Continue reading

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POEM: This Is Knot Poetry — When Red Allowed

Waiving his red pen He made his mute point That spoken word is knot poetry Like meting Meter and anti-meter And the invariable deconstruction of awe As if Employing free Versus The hire mind For awe That its worth Save … Continue reading

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POEM: Promedica My Ass — Owed To Branding

Logos used Too mean Know ledge Like that age owed ad vice Would you jump off a bridge If every won ails did As in sayin’ Bye your good will As money oozes from the non-prophet, health care (sic) system … Continue reading

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POEM: Tickling God’s Whiskers

He thought Too himself More or less THAT would tickle God’s whiskers Which was particularly funny Since God has no whiskers Un-less That is God is right Under your knows This short poem plays with the notion that God is … Continue reading

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POEM: That Arguable Grip

He argued Fore cynicism Farced to choose between What’s left What is right And he one handily With won hand tied behind his back Soundly Like the slow clap With the only hope That he is not contagious And that … Continue reading

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POEM: The Reason Donald Trump Sucks

The reason Donald Trump sucks Is that he is full of himself And the vacuum created Can’t help Butt purse His lips Like the Donald, this poem speaks for itself.

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POEM: Lost And Found

Sum wear Long the weigh Countless souls Lost Their sense of humor Only too end up Way to Sirius Occupying that eternal box Under the counter Only willing To pass it long To whom sow ever Claims it for their … Continue reading

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POEM: Namaste

Who dares ax Why I am Sow meta for As the spear it in me Razes up Too meat the spirit in you This poem is an ode to my favorite version of the greeting “namaste:” may the spirit in … Continue reading

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POEM: A Corny Poem — Owed To Iowa

He was feeling it In a corny state The mother of corn starch In the thick of it A sweet mother High on fructose Full of it As lots of feed In feedlots Of walking meat But it was my … Continue reading

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POEM: Sex Before Marriage?

He in choired So you think people should have sex before marriage? My straight forward rejoined her: Hell, I think people should have sex before breakfast! This short poem is a playful response to the straight-laced attitudes of many religious … Continue reading

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POEM: Throwing Up Her Arms in Disgust

She threw up her arms in disgust He said that she might want to stick to finger food This short, funny poem is a good case study into how my twisted mind works. First, I am not often put off … Continue reading

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POEM: Mountain of Love

He cried out “I would climb the highest mountain for you!” She said “How about doing your fair share of housework?” This short poem goes out to all the ladies in the house.  I am a big fan of epic … Continue reading

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POEM: Cautionary Tail

Ouch! That guy should come with a warning label She said after Having had A piece of cautionary tail You can divide life’s lessons into two basic categories: 1) that which deserves emulating, and 2) that which warrants avoidance.  This … Continue reading

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POEM: On a Roll!

In my write mind I am on a roll Plain and simple And there is nothing butter On that! I haven’t published a poem in a while.  This is because this week the muse has had other plans for me.  … Continue reading

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POEM: High Cost of Employment

Despite the high cost of employment It is still quite popular This short poem is a takeoff or elaboration of Will Rogers’ infamous statement: Despite the high cost of living, it’s still quite popular.  As wage slavery continues largely unabated, … Continue reading

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POEM: Word Jonesing

She said Your poetry seems like a lot of work I said It’s less wordsmithing And more wordjonesing Or sew it would seam There is little doubt that reading my poetry takes some work.  It is commonplace in my poetry … Continue reading

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POEM: My Indian Name

After my vision quest My shaman told me From now on My Indian name would be “Rhymes with orange” Only having never Seen an orange This short poem can be viewed as one of my more whimsical poems, or perhaps … Continue reading

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POEM: Sinking Ship

When a ship is sinking It may be wiser to follow the rats Rather than the humans That is, if you can tell the difference This Titanic poem juxtaposes the zeniths and abysses of humans, created only a little less … Continue reading

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