Customer Service POEM: On Hold

Holed for service
A fool 40 minutes
Before it curse to me
this while
Writing a verse
And now
is write with the whirled
And still
Feeling somewhat loopy
With Muzak
As the soundtrack of my
A borrowed cell
To get my net back
As technically
I have no phone
Without it
Beating this again
Buy perpetually wading
Virtually forever
A least weigh
Passed an hour
As much after
Out to lunch
Liable too due the same
In need of stomaching something else
…and halve an our later
I’m done
With out to lunch
Buckeye CableSystem you suck
The write out of me

I wrote this poem while on hold with Buckeye CableSystem after my internet went out. Unfortunately, my phone runs off of the internet, so I can’t use my phone to call service. I have a landline, no cell phone. I borrowed my neighbor’s cell phone. After 90+ minutes on hold, I decided to hang up and dial again. Fortunately, they answered this time, after about 15 minutes. They had the internet up and running after a few hours. Unfortunately, my phone still doesn’t work, 13 days later, as my telephone provider, Pioneer Telephone, concluded after a week that whatever Buckeye CableSystem made to the network was blocking the phone service. Perhaps typically, the phone technical service folks didn’t bother to tell me what they had concluded; I just got an e-mail that the ticket was closed. I sent an e-mail copied to both service providers asking them to get together and this out. I haven’t heard anything yet. Perhaps they tried to call me!! I have been pondering stepping up my sabbaticals. As I will soon enter week three without phone service, I suppose that I should be careful what I pray for.

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