RAMBO JESUS CARTOON: Will of Rambo Jesus Revealed – Protect The Fodder-land

I’ve always been dumbstruck how Christians so easily justify violence, especially since there is so little in the Gospels that can be fodder for envisioning a violence-advocating Jesus.  Violence always strikes me as a deathly perilous game of “means” and “ends.”  You know, live by the sword, die by the sword. Perhaps most importantly, institutionalized violence is dreadfully prone to benefit elites, who are generally not combatants, and kill approximately 10 civilians for every combatant killed. Those hurt by violence most are way more likely to be the most vulnerable people on both sides of a conflict. At the heart of every true religion is compassion and care for the most vulnerable –you know, widows and orphans. The seduction to violently impose won’s will on others strikes me as the opposite of authentic religious sensibilities. Of course, if following Jesus was easy, everybody would be doing it. OK, calm down, don’t get cross…

In the spirit of American Christianity and its ridiculously easy acceptance of violence, I bring you this RAMBO JESUS CARTOON: Will of Rambo Jesus Revealed – Protect The Fodder-land.

RAMBO JESUS CARTOON: Will of Rambo Jesus Revealed - Protect The Fodder-land

Feel free to browse my peace and anti-war designs.

RAMBO JESUS: Taking U.S. To School – Salvation is in Hand – This Time You’ll Pay For Your Own Sins

In surreal fashion, I await for the U.S. followers of The Prince of Peace to provide moral leadership in fighting the unrelenting epidemic of mass shootings carried out with military-style guns. Perhaps U.S. Christians are too busy making plans to escort their children to school in tactical gear and scheduling armed posses to patrol school grounds. Of course, Jesus will be by their side, to the end of time. In times of prayers and preyers, perhaps they are asking, “Which assault rifle would Jesus use?” Right-wing American Christians seem comfortable relying on supreme military might and households full of guns to deal with neighbors both nearby and afar. Their one crucifixion to rule them all seems to offer carte blanche to kill whichever chosen people their tribe sees unfit. Gee, that couldn’t backfire at all [insert sarcasm here]. Of course, if sacrificial love to the point of death was easy, then everybody would be doing it. I’m not surprised that people are afraid and want their guns, or hired mercenary guns, to protect their interests, just let U.S. stop pretending that it’s Christian. This hypocrisy just adds insult to injury. Such lethal hypocrisy is worthy of mocking. In that spirit, please feel free to meditate upon this political cartoon: RAMBO JESUS: Taking U.S. To School – Salvation is in Hand – This Time You’ll Pay For Your Own Sins.

RAMBO JESUS: Taking the U.S. To School - Salvation is in Hand - This Time You'll Pay For Your Own Sins

Also, please feel free to browse my peace and gun violence prevention designs.

POSTER: Partisan Man – Senator Rob Portman – Mitch McConnell Made Me Do It!

This free poster is another installment in my “Parity or Parody in Democracy” series.  This poster features Sen. Rob Portman as Partisan Man, yet another white man.  This political cartoon was inspired by Sen. Portman, white man among white men, in the exclusive group of Republican senators appointed by Mitch McConnell, Senate Majority Leader, all of whom are white men.

Sen. Portman, an alleged moderate, has recently weakened his role as a critic of the profoundly ironically named Better Care Reconciliation Act.  Sen. Portman was handed his shorts over his pet advocacy project, preserving opioid treatment while decimating overall health care for the poor, addicts, and mentally ill; they included less than 5% of what he asked for!  Despite this insulting result, Sen. Portman has weakened rather than strengthened his opposition to the bill.  He missed the opportunity of joining other Senate Republicans in challenging the rushed process without adequate legislator review or public hearings.  Sen. Portman appears ready to collapse into whimpering partisanship, neither demanding a transparent, democratic process nor a bill that even resembles improving the health of Americans.  Single-Payer Health Care - Everybody In, Nobody OutWe Can't Fix The Economy Until We Fix Health Care POLITICAL BUTTONOhio’s elected so-called representative is looking more and more like a compliant minion of Senate Republican bosses.  He can blame it on Mitch McConnell with a proverbial “Mitch McConnell made me do it,” but Ohioans did not elect Mitch McConnell as their representative.  His hiding behind is another version of covering one’s ass.  The Republicans, led by their megalomaniacal president, can’t hide behind their big PP, Partisan Politics, in this presumptive Trumpcare debacle.  You may note that the American flag in this poster is upside down; this is because and upside down flag is a distress call.  Let’s up right this topsy turvy nation of ours and reject the pathetic machinations of Republican health care so-called reform.  It is time for health care for all — everybody in, nobody out!  It doesn’t get any less partisan than that!!

PARTISAN MAN - Senator Rob Portman

 

 

COMEDIAN JESUS: Pax Romana — You’re Killing Me!

This Comedian Jesus political cartoon highlights the shallow liberalism and false choices of Pax Romana, the metaphorical stand-in for Pax Americana, peace through so-called enlightened domination.

Comedian Jesus Pax Romana Killing Me

This Comedian Jesus cartoon also ties the all-too-convenient collaboration of political and religious elites in the less-than-enlightened shared interest of self-preservation and the status quo.  Prophets, making radical calls for accountability, and modeling self-sacrifice, make the powers that be grate agin and agin.  Many American Christians oddly reframe Jesus execution as simply some sort of metaphysical accounting adjustment, minimizing his direct challenge to political and religious elites.  Jesus was a threat to Roman political rule, brutally enforced by military rule in its extended territories, the colonies of the age.  Racism, xenophobia, and straightforward domination was part and parcel to the Roman order, cynically referred to as Pax Romana.  Non Violent Revolutionaries Raze Hell--POLITICAL BUTTONJesus’ creative nonviolence suited the oppressed Jews (and others) with amor of hope, and provided bold tools to disarm Roman rule.   Non Violent Revolution--POLITICAL BUTTONJesus was a threat to religious elites due to his profound challenges to the authority and legitimacy of religious elites and his surging popularity.  Also, Jesus was seen as indirectly stoking the possibilities of a violent insurrection (Judas, from the Zealots who believed in violent insurrection, may have betrayed Jesus in hopes that his martyrdom would trigger revolutionary actions among the populace).  The religious elites had much to lose as their collaboration with the occupying Roman powers had bought them special privileges, a classic technique of dominating powers to buy so-called peace, in this case the brutal-for-most Pax Romana.  PEACE QUOTE: Peaceful Revolution--PEACE SIGN BUTTONPilate, in questioning Jesus employs another classic technique of ultimately evading accountability with his infamous “What is truth?” interrogative.  This now infamous questioning, would eventually become an iconic emblem of what is now central to postmodern thought: the relativity of truth.  For the worse, such an easy liberalism provides great smokescreens for the powers that be to evade accountability with feigned intellectual and ideological credence.  The modern day Roman empire of Western civilization has assured full employment of this shallow liberalism.  This Comedian Jesus political cartoon parodies this with the brutal liberality of getting to choose your method of death, the too-close-too-home reality for millions under Pax Americana.

America Is NOT At War, The Military Is At War, America Is At The Mall POLITICAL BUTTONTo bring all of this home in contemporary fashion, the choice of Roman/American citizens choosing which shade of empire they want to enrich its citizenry, casts a long shadow, and essentially false choice from the perspective of those not benefiting from Roman/American citizenship. End The Warfare State ANTI-WAR BUTTON While the votes of citizens are bought with many denominations, and presented in contrasting shades of liberality, the church of American privilege is built on a foundation of military might and awe that money can buy.  For those whose world is colonized by America, or who live and die as nominal citizens relegated to apartheid-like ghettos, the so-called choice of their brand of ruler remains of profoundly grate consequence.  People Before Profits POLITICAL BUTTONPlanetary citizens are hoping for prophets over profits.  It's A Planet Not An Empire POLITICAL BUTTONMother Earth is quiet udderly sweating this election.  I witness the desperate fighting for our own scraps of privilege as sadly pathetic in the light of America’s finest ideals.  May we rise up in another American revolution, this time for the benefit all God’s children and beauteous creation.

rEVOLution is the Solution (LOVE) - POLITICAL BUTTONIn Times of Universal Deceit Telling Truth a Revolutionary Act--PEACE QUOTE BUTTON

Feel free to browse more of Top Pun’s anti-imperialism designs designed to end global domination.

Comedian Jesus: Any TRUMP? NO, Go Fish, I’m Not Playing That Game

This Comedian Jesus cartoon combines the contemporary unwanted news cycle of Donald Trump with the timeless question of: Precisely what game are you playing?

Comedian Jesus: Any TRUMP? NO, Go Fish, Not Playing That Game

This Comedian Jesus cartoon is an inspired hybrid of a pun on “Trump,” and my poem, “Different Game:”

Sorry, I don’t have any bargaining chips
I’m playing a different game

Perhaps it goes without saying that I am a real card.

The fact that Jesus hung out with fisherman, real working class people, is just another bonus layer on the metaphor of the card game: fish.

Elect Satan - Why Pick The Lesser Of Two Evils - FUNNY POLITICAL BUTTONA ballot is like a bullet. You don't throw your ballots until you see a target, and if that target is not in reach, keep your ballot in your pocket. Malcolm X quote POLITICAL BUTTONIn the current epic game of the lesser of two evils, Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton vie to benefit more by comparison than by any solid or transcendent standard.  The cynicism in politics is largely defined by the perpetual cycle of disappointment in the politicians that we elect.  We are frightened by both “means” and “ends.”  We are blackmailed into compromised candidates, wear fear and compromised boundary setting conspire to deliver the “goods” that are, in fact, not good.  As captives of fear, compromised “means” unsurprisingly produce congruent “ends.”  The simple fact is that you will not produce politicians substantially better than the electorate.  We want politicians to save us from one another, when what we need to be saved from is our own fear. This myth of redemptive politicians short-circuits the reality that we must be the change we want to see in the world.  CAPITOL PUNISHMENT: Those Without The Capitol Get The Punishment [capitol building] POLITICAL BUTTONThe fact that we look to fundamentally compromised candidates to triumph over other fundamentally compromised candidates, speaks to low expectations consistent with the tattered boundaries (based on our values) that we set (or don’t set).  These boundaries are based on who each person wants to be, not who they want others to be.  We are all leaders.  We need solidarity with one another, not the desire to rule over others.  Defeat The Elite POLITICAL BUTTONElectoral politics is overwhelmingly about choosing who, some elite typically, to rule over us.  Ruling over others is the devil’s game. You can’t beat the devil at his own game.

In my view, we need to be well centered in solid and/or transcendent standards along with the courage to see a different game possible.  The solid and/or transcendent standards speak to a long game, dare I say eternal (or timeless).  The courage speaks to every moment presented to me where I have a choice of ruling/dominating over others or living as true equals, with equal respect and claim to our human rights.  It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen -- George MacDonald quote POLITICAL BUTTONSuch a courageous game of equality and solidarity is anathema to privilege.  True solidarity is always directed at the disenfranchised, those whose human rights are trampled, humanity marginalized, and personhood monetized.  Gangs of privileged folks crying, “All lives matter” in the face of people rising up to claim their human rights is not true solidarity.  For a long time now, I’ve viewed “First Worldism” as the fundamental disconnect on the planet.  This disconnect is centered in the USA.  Americans certainly have their problems at home.  Nevertheless, these problems are rooted, and overshadowed, by the disconnect with the wrest of the second and third world — most of the world.  American exceptionalism is exceptionally bad for the planet and humanity, and a nearly psychotic break from reality.  For every thousand hacking at the leaves of evil is one striking at the root. Emerson quote POLITICAL BUTTONIf the game in the center ring is to secure better social benefits on the deathstar that is America, rather than dismantle the deathstar, then America will be a plague on this planet and a cancer on humanity.  I intend to play a different game.

Please feel free to browse other thought-provoking designs on breaking through the lies and propaganda in politics to live in transparent truth.

POLITICAL CARTOON: CEO Jesus Retirement Plan

CEO Jesus: You Had Me At The Retirement Plan

CEO Jesus Retirement PlanAfter a long hiatus, CEO Jesus is back.  This comic was inspired by a poem I wrote recently:

At Jesus, Inc.
I came for the love and mutuality
I stayed for the retirement plan

This poem and political cartoon is a parody of the often namby-pamby, first-world Christianity that passes for following Jesus these days.  I sometimes joke that I wish there was a religion where the founder was a nonviolent rabble-rouser crucified by the state, perhaps even as their fellow clansmen stood complicit.  That’s a leader to which I could relate.   I occasionally wonder what Christianity would look like if we amped it up so that, say, 1% of Christians were killed as a direct result of their radical love challenging the powers that be of this world.  What if Christians seriously risked destitution or death for the cause of love more commonly than building “secure” retirement plans?  These are the kinds of questions that haunt me and in which I find little traction or resonance within the walls of American Christianity.  Ahhh, for a Church that boldly embraces such questions; this is the Church I long for…

Peruse more political cartoons featuring CEO Jesus, General Jesus, Comedian Jesus, Dr. Jesus, and Palestinian Jew Jesus

POLITICAL CARTOON: General Jesus Welcomes NATO Protesters to Chicago

Jesus Welcomes NATO Protesters to Chicago!

Jesus Cartoon: General Jesus -  Protesting NATO in Chicago

Jesus and I will be at the NATO protest this Sunday in Chicago.  The temperature is expected to be 87°.  The Chicago Centurions, i.e., the Secret Service and the FBI, will not be allowing more than 3 ounces of liquid per protester in the designated demonstration locations.  Also, the powers that be will not be allowing protesters to bring any food with them.  This is a great way to kill off protesters with heatstroke!  However, this is probably merely a cynical way to assure that food and beverage vendors make a killing.  Wow, you’ve got to love capitalism!  Fortunately, with Jesus there, the protest is likely to be very peaceful; since the protesters will have no more than 3 ounces of wine to drink!  Yes, it should be a sobering experience — hopefully a for all concerned, and those not so concerned.

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of General Jesus, Comedian Jesus, Doctor Jesus, CEO Jesus, Country Club Jesus, etc., let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: Comedian Jesus – HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

Jesus Wishes Happy Mother’s Day

Jesus Cartoon: Comedian Jesus -  HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Comedian Jesus, like the rest of us, has a mom.  Of course, Jesus, being perfect, would never forget to wish his mother a happy Mother’s Day.  However, Jesus has an advantage of being a perfect child.  Not everybody has a great relationship with their mother.  Nonetheless, Jesus is a patient and understanding son, indulging his mother’s occasional insecurities or whining.  Still, this is no great accomplishment for the Son of God.  The greater difficulty comes in exactly how to celebrate Father’s Day; having two daddies can present some complications.  We’ll just have to see how comedian Jesus deals with that!

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of Comedian Jesus, Doctor Jesus, CEO Jesus, General Jesus, Country Club Jesus, etc., let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: Dr. Jesus – Blessed Insurance

Doctor Jesus Goes on Rounds

Jesus Cartoon: DOCTOR Jesus -  Blessed Insurance

Dr. Jesus, a teacher as well, works at a teaching hospital.  Dr. Jesus takes every opportunity possible to share his love of medicine with others.  Of course, working at a prestigious teaching hospital doesn’t come cheap!  So, Dr. Jesus first asks his followers to join him in and a round of the hymn, “Blessed Insurance.”  Dr. Jesus knows who puts hummus on his pita bread!  Also, it proved to be eminently more practical than Dr. Jesus’ original health care plan, “Health Care for Awe.”  Even with Dr. Jesus’ new-found practicality, he still remains suspect for his whole “health care for a song” business.

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of Doctor Jesus, CEO Jesus, Comedian Jesus, General Jesus, Country Club Jesus, etc., let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: CEO Jesus Takes May Day Off

CEO Jesus Honors May Day Strike!

Jesus Cartoon: CEO Jesus - May Day Strike

CEO Jesus is willing to honor the worldwide general strike called for May Day.  Of course (probably golf course), taking off May Day doesn’t mean that the help necessarily gets the day off.  I mean really, who’s going to caddy for me on my day off?!  Jesus is likely more familiar with May Day than most Americans, since May Day is celebrated as a labor holiday in virtually every other country besides the United States.  And even though Jesus has established citizenship as a U.S. citizen, he may still have some familiarity with the customs of his old stomping grounds elsewhere in the world.  So, be like Jesus, take May Day off!

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of CEO Jesus, Doctor Jesus, Comedian Jesus, General Jesus, Country Club Jesus, etc., let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: CEO Jesus – Rendering Unto Ceasar

CEO Jesus Loves Tax Time!

Jesus Cartoon: CEO Jesus - Rendering Unto Ceasar What is Ceasar's

CEO Jesus really loves tax time!  Of course, Jesus opposes Imperial Rome just as much as Jesus opposes Imperial United States.  And what’s the best way to bring down a government?  De-fund it!  If paying taxes is evil, then getting the government to pay you must be good.  Now, if you are an individual and the government pays you, then that is no-good, lazy, welfare behavior.  But, if you are a corporation, then it is good business AND morally commendable.  What could be better than to get paid to be good!  And the corporations said, “Let just us reign.”

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of CEO Jesus, Comedian Jesus, Doctor Jesus, General Jesus, Country Club Jesus, etc., let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: Doctor Jesus – Pre-existing Condition

Doctor Jesus on Call!

Jesus Cartoon: Doctor Jesus - Pre-existing Condition

Welcome to Dr. Jesus!  This is the debut week for Dr. Jesus.  Of all the incarnations in this Jesus comic strip, portraying Jesus as a healer is probably the closest to reality.  Of course, this comic strip is about parody, not straight up facts — at least not in a direct way.  It may seem strange that Dr. Jesus shows up as one of the later characters in this comic strip series.  Nonetheless, it is strangely appropriate that we would have to wait for the doctor.  If this is not a common straight up fact, then I don’t know what is!  Until Dr. Obama offered his prescription for a solution to part of the many health-care dilemmas in the United States, the dreaded pre-existing condition was one of the greatest scourges in healthcare.  Of course, today, the most dangerous pre-existing condition in the United States is not having health insurance, which afflicts about 50 million Americans.  I suspect that Dr. Jesus would’ve been open to prescribing universal healthcare for those around him.  But, of course, his methods are very suspect, as the biblical record seems very weak on documenting sound billing practices on Jesus’ part.  Oddly, in the most wealthy nation in the history of humankind, or perhaps human unkind, we still seem to be deathly afraid of offering healthcare to all people who need it.  Somehow this seems to be tied to money — surprise, surprise!  Even more oddly, the United States spends 50-100% more per capita on healthcare than those other advanced industrial democracies, which all provide universal healthcare.  Further, these other nations that provide universal healthcare all have healthier populations!  For all the talk of running government like a business, shouldn’t getting the most for your health care dollar be a top agenda item?  The reality is that we don’t care to run the government like a business at all, we want to run the government for the benefit of business, not the people.  So, business runs the government.  Business runs the people.  This strikes me as totally backwards.  Perhaps government should assure that business practices are humane and for the benefit of people.  If the government is of the people, for the people, and by the people, then it should serve the people, not just business people.  Jesus was a profound forerunner in occupying healthcare.  Let us join Jesus; let us follow Jesus in occupying healthcare!

POLITICAL CARTOON: CEO Jesus – Birthers

CEO Jesus Arises to the Occasion!

Jesus Cartoon: CEO Jesus - Re-Birthers Press Conference

CEO Jesus really rises to the occasion this week of Easter!  What could be tougher than answering the difficult and often inane questions put forth at a press conference?  In his first go around, Jesus’ public relations department really had a big gaffe by sending two women to witness the resurrection.  In Jesus’ day, women were not considered reliable or viable witnesses.  What was he thinking?  Of course, the modern-day CEO Jesus understands the complexities of oppression in Western civilization.  These days, proper paperwork and avoiding getting bogged down in innuendo are the armor and shield of modern management.  There’s no question that many modern folks doubt the actual physical resurrection of Jesus.  For me, that’s less the point than addressing truth in an upfront and Jesus like manner — actually living a life that witnesses to the profound truth that life is stronger than death.   In these modern times, with all of our science and technological sophistication, obfuscation of the truth is as old school as ever!  This week’s parody is on the birthers.  Who needs facts when simple doubt will do?  Why accept evidence when such realities don’t suit one’s biases and bigotries?  When Jesus appeared before Pilate, Pilate mocked the irrelevancy of truth, with his classic rhetorical question, “What is truth?”  In the end, Pilate just tested the political winds and gave the mob what they wanted.  Some things never change.

Interestingly, modern day evangelical Christians seem more interested in proper documentation through theological litmus tests and dogmas of belief in whether one should receive the proper credentials of being “born again” than the incarnate power of Jesus boldly witnessing to the reality that life is stronger than death, and good is stronger than evil.  Rather than exchanging résumés of belief, I would suggest that they will know we are Christians by our love, not our doctrine.  Unfortunately, for human control freaks, the way of love is way too wild and free.  By reducing deep spiritual truths to belief and dogmas, institutional religion is born, again, and competition for brand control become the preeminent reality.  Jesus rocks, quite literally on Easter, but I find that Christianity often gets in the way of following Jesus.  Wherever you are entombed in your life, come out!  Hmm…is that Jesus calling?

POLITICAL CARTOON: Comedian Jesus – Tough Crowd

Comedian Jesus Speaks!

Jesus Cartoon: Comedian Jesus - Tough Crowd

Well, this week marks a difficult week for comedian Jesus.  As is the case with many standup guys, one day they get adulating crowds, then the next day they get deeply disappointed crowds.  It is the fickle reality of a comedian.  Upon Jesus’ entrance into Jerusalem for Passover, the crowds went wild and it seemed that he could do no wrong.  However, by the end of the week, Barabbas, the crowd-pleasing insurrectionist, would be the flavor of the day.  Fortunately, for those patient enough to stick with Jesus, he’s working on some really great new material for next week, and presaging a deadpan Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jesus matter-of-factually reminds his crowd, “I’ll be back.”

POLITICAL CARTOON: Country Club Jesus – Jewish, Non-American, Non-English-speaking

Country Club Jesus Speaks!

Jesus Cartoon: Country Club Jesus - Jewish Non-American Non-English-Speaking

Country Club Jesus speaks to us in many ways.  Ironically, Country Club Jesus, perhaps soon to be an American icon (lol), is neither American, nor speaks English.  Even more shocking, is that Jesus was a Jew.  Of course, this week’s comic touches on all three of these issues.  Hearkening back to the days when country clubs simply did not accept non-whites or non-Christians, the revelation of Jesus’ Jewishness would be better kept as a secret, and better to let people assume that the Christ is in fact a Christian.  Returning to current day America, with a new brand of xenophobia, suspicions of the need to exclude would probably center more around Jesus as a Middle Eastern man rather than a Jew.  Profiling Middle Eastern men as potential terrorists it second nature in America today, and may even be classified as a national hobby/obsession.  Notwithstanding, I’m most curious as to how the English-only crowd sees Jesus who in reality is a foreign speaking (Aramaic), well, foreigner.  Even more oddly for the American English-only crowd, they seem to often have a fetish with the King James version of the Bible, which is hardly an American version of English, let alone modern-day British English, since it was completed in 1611.  Sticking to such a version strikes me as an unwise balance between tradition and accessibility.  I would argue that if the Bible cannot be translated into more accessible English, in the case of American English speakers, then there must be some fundamental disconnect between biblical truths and modern life (which I don’t believe to be true).  I also find it incredibly ironic that one of the most popular version of the Bible was commissioned and given oversight by a monarch, a king.  I find this ironic because I see Jesus as standing against worldly authorities, monarchies, and the like.  But hey, I guess you’ve got to have a wealthy and powerful sponsor to get your message across.  Maybe we should sell naming rights to the next version.  How about the Wal-Mart Bible, or the Exxon Mobil Bible, or the Bank of America Bible, the McDonald’s Bible, or the J.P. Morgan Chase Bible?

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of Comedian Jesus, CEO Jesus, Country Club Jesus, etc., let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: Comedian Jesus – Love Your Enemies

Comedian Jesus Speaks!

Jesus Cartoon: Comedian Jesus - Love Your Enemies, Hah, Good One!

Welcome to Comedian Club Jesus!  This is the latest installment the Top Pun series of comics that run on Sundays, featuring CEO Jesus, Free Market Jesus, Country Club Jesus, General Jesus, Comedian Jesus, and who knows what other incarnations!  This is the first appearance of Comedian Jesus, but he will undoubtedly return again!  Comedian Jesus knows how to make them laugh!  People have taken Jesus way too seriously in the past.  Seriously, how may times do you have to read the sermon on the Mount to realize that Jesus was just being sarcastic.  My best guess is that the person recording the sermon was laughing so hard that their handwriting must have been abominable, and confusion was bound to follow.  Of course, experience with the classic joke of this week, loving your enemies, is enough to ascertain that Jesus was joking.  Trust me, just tell someone to love their enemies and wait for the punch line.  Of course, the punch line being an actual line of people waiting to punch you, either literally or figuratively for suggesting such a ridiculous notion.  Of course, my guess is that this is not the biggest disappointment that Jesus had.  For instance, Jesus was probably really bummed by having to be crucified rather than just having an arrow shot through his head.  But comics, particularly jesters, often have little control over how things end for them, or how they are interpreted.  I’m guessing that some people are really hoping to for some new material in his second show…

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of Comedian Jesus, CEO Jesus, Free Market Jesus, etc., talk amongst yourselves or let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: Country Club Jesus – Blessed are those who exclude others for economic reasons

Country Club Jesus Speaks!

Jesus Cartoon: Country Club Jesus - Blessed are Those who Exclude Others Economic Reasons

Welcome to Country Club Jesus!  This is the latest installment the Top Pun series of comics that run on Sundays, featuring CEO Jesus, Free Market Jesus, Country Club Jesus, General Jesus, Comedian Jesus, and who knows what other incarnations!

This is the first appearance of Country Club Jesus, but he will undoubtedly return again!  Country Club Jesus has finally got some balls, a bucket full of them as a matter of fact.  You have to wonder with Jesus being so special why he waited so long for this exclusive members only thing!  But, he’s finally caught up with his church that seems to focus more on guarding its exclusive member benefits than actually growing the circle of members, or God forbid, actually living out its mission to set the oppressed free.

A lot of things in life cost a lot of money.  The world tends to focus on what it can’t afford and the infinite versions of trying to use money to meet needs that money cannot fill.  Like John Lennon says “All you need is love.”  Right, that and a Cadillac will get you a Cadillac, others say.  I can certainly relate to how complicated it is trying to sort through all of our basic needs and meet them, and certainly money has a role in that process.  Nonetheless, I find it much more useful to frame our most basic needs in terms of what I can’t afford not to do.  This hones in on those relatively few, yet most important, values that get roughshod on a daily basis.  This helps foster a more conscientious approach to that which is important but not necessarily urgent.  It is essential to be able to define what the good life is.  If money is the lowest common denominator in this definition, then you can expect that your life will not rise much above this lowest common denominator.  I return often to the classic and profound dichotomy that Jesus laid out:  you can serve either God or money, but not both.  This is a basic choice that cascades into the rest of our life every day, every month, every season, every year, every decade, every generation.  If we screw up that basic choice between God and money, our life will necessarily be disordered.  First things first.  Seek ye first the realm of God and all else will follow.  The screwed up worldly version of this is: no money, no mission.  If you can’t tell the difference between these two versions, then it’s time to get back to the basics.  Oh, and by the way, it probably doesn’t include beating up others with your exclusive club!

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of CEO Jesus, Free Market Jesus, etc., talk amongst yourselves or let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: General Jesus – Blessed Are Those Who Kill People Who Kill People

General Jesus Speaks!

Jesus Cartoon: General Jesus - Blessed Are Those Who Kill People Who Kill People

Welcome to Gen. Jesus!  This is the third installment a new Top Pun series of comics that will run on Sundays, featuring CEO Jesus, Free Market Jesus, Country Club Jesus, General Jesus, Comedian Jesus, and who knows what other incarnations!

This week’s Gen. Jesus is an over-the-top parody of the pacifist Jesus.  As you can see, Jesus is quite at home in his oil-rich desert that we know as the Middle East.  This is a top assignment which he probably garnered by being able to speak both English and Aramaic.  Notice that Jesus’ cap is slightly askew, as a tip of the hat to the little people, and perhaps a subtle clue to his truly radical nature hidden behind an unstoppable war machine.  As he humbly points to his “killing people” medals, he is quick to point out that he did not actually do the killing, but he has people who do this for him; it is simply his great leadership and command of billions of dollars of killing technology that justifies such colorful, ostentatious displays.

General Jesus’ lesson for today is a kick ass, shock and awe moral principle: killing people is a very effective way of showing people that killing people is wrong.  If this moral lesson seems somewhat screwed up to you, it must be because you are unable to grasp the many subtleties that spring forth from the moral pillars of brute force and impersonal killing that drone on and on.  Of course, General Jesus knows certain things that we don’t.  Perhaps this is why we are asked to trust him.

The longer version of this moral lesson is that killing people who kill people shows people that killing people is bad, and this is a sure guarantee that we will never get out of the job of killing people.  Remember, it’s all about jobs: snow jobs, con jobs, and the occasional sweatshop job (somebody has to make all that crap).

On a more serious note, it is interesting to note that Jesus was a powerful opponent of Roman imperialism, which played well with the masses since he was part of one of the many groups that were put down by Roman imperialism.  In fact, the book of Revelation in the Bible is considered an allegory speaking against imperial Rome.  Apparently, sometimes you need to couch what you say in terms that your intended audience will understand, but not so obvious that the powers that be will come and take you away.  However, Jesus apparently did not master this ability completely, as he was taken away and executed by Rome and its complicit cronies.   Those of us who are into the power of humor will appreciate that many of Jesus’ titles are actually intended to mock the worldly and political powers of the day.  Calling someone “Lord” in the Roman Empire would be seen as an infringement upon Caesar’s god-given rights.  This would be similar to calling Jesus “Commander-in-Chief” in modern-day United States.  Not surprisingly, religion and the state often do battle over claims to ultimate allegiance.  This is the way it should be, or perhaps, must be.  How these particular battles turn out probably depend upon your view of ultimate power.  If you think that fear, control, and domination are the most deciding factors in human life, then I would say side with the state.  However, if you think that love, solidarity, and service to one another are the most deciding factors in human life, then I would say side in a higher power, sometimes in the guise of religion.  In the end, it seems to come down to voting with one’s feet, voting with the existential force that is our life.  I choose to vote for love, solidarity, and service to one another.  What say you?

POLITICAL CARTOON: CEO Jesus – The Meek Shall Inherit the Earth

CEO Jesus Speaks: The Meek Shall Inherit the Earth!

Jesus Cartoon: CEO - Meek Shall Inherit the Earth

Welcome to CEO Jesus!  This is the second installment a new Top Pun series of comics that will run on Sundays, featuring CEO Jesus, Free Market Jesus, Country Club Jesus, General Jesus, Comedian Jesus, and who knows what other incarnations!

This week’s CEO Jesus is a close cousin to Free Market Jesus.  CEO Jesus has the same signature pile of cash vainly looking for someone to hire – ha ha ha!  CEO Jesus wears a simple black tie that makes him look eerily like a Bible salesman.  I am always creeped out by the wall of corporate logos and names that are now routinely placed behind speakers from virtually any major organization when making press statements or giving speeches.  I am sure that some truly wise public relations experts would argue that this is just taking advantage of another opportunity to brand oneself or one’s organization.  I would agree that they’re definitely taking advantage of something, but branding can really hurt! .  They would probably also point out that resistance is futile — I would rather say resistance is feudal, peasants resisting their commercial overlords.  Of course, if CEO Jesus is going to have a press release he has to literally stand behind his corporation, Jesus, Inc.  Thus, the omnipresent corporate logos.  Actually, it all makes me a little cross ( pun intended).  Now, I am not aware of Jesus ever founding a formal organization, however, some say that he founded the Church.  Even this I am not sure was Jesus’  intention.  Jesus was a Jew, and I am not convinced that he felt the need to be more than a Jew.  Certainly, Jesus was a religious reformer, and he directed his religious reform efforts at Judaism.  Also, I think that Jesus was into inclusivity and wanted to greatly expand Judaism, even to the point which it could fairly easily be argued that it was something completely new.  However, Jesus strikes me as being much more of an anarchist than a director of a nonprofit organization; especially since so many nonprofit organizations are also non-prophet organizations.

Now, back to the cartoon.  The fact that the meek shall inherit the earth is probably not the most popular concept in the Bible.  Meekness typically has a connotation of weakness rather than humility, and neither of these are particularly valued in our culture.  Weakness gets no shrift whatsoever, and this probably explains why our culture will careen practically anywhere except towards greater intimacy, which requires vulnerability and a humble acceptance of our weaknesses.  Either way, the CEOs of this world will not budge in their rejection of anything in the ballpark of meekness.  Thus, the declaration by CEO Jesus, most assuredly after consulting his team of lawyers, that while this distant and probably meaningless promise in some vague future may require some acknowledgement, there is no reason to expect any real world accountability related to this promise.  Perhaps, the leftovers or toxic waste that remains after consuming the entire planet could conceivably be included in the meek’s inheritance, but even this depends on whether or not the CEOs are in a good mood.  In the end, CEOs can be counted on only to provide that which they are obliged to provide, preferably contractually.  Even then, if not providing that which they are obliged to provide costs more in legal fees, fines, etc. then providing it, then they will just bail on their obligations and write it off as a business expense.  After all, you have to do what the market bears, right?  Or, is that what the market bulls?

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of CEO Jesus, Free Market Jesus, etc., talk amongst yourselves or let me know what you think.

POLITICAL CARTOON: Free Market Jesus – Blessed Are The Amoral

Free Market Jesus Speaks!

Jesus Cartoon: Free Market Jesus - Blessed Are Those Who Let The Market Decide Your Morals

Welcome to Free Market Jesus!  This is a new Top Pun series of comics that will run on Sundays, featuring Free Market Jesus, Country Club Jesus, Gen. Jesus, Comedian Jesus, and who knows what other incarnations!

This week’s comic captures the amorality and sociopathy of the free market.  People are moral agents, or least people should be moral agents.  Free markets are not moral agents.  Unfortunately, though, people who function with the amoral boundaries of the so-called free market relinquish their moral agency to other human beings, or worse yet, to inert matter.  Further, moral agents really don’t get the choice of being amoral.  The vain hope of amorality distinctly falls into the category of immorality.  I see the near religious attachment to the idea of a free market primarily as a way to avoid personal responsibility for one’s actions and how they may affect others.  Part of being a human being is taking responsibility for one’s actions.  You can’t outsource your personal responsibility, no matter how hard you try, or how little you try, as the case may be.  This lack of free choice in whether we are responsible for our own actions, is what Jean-Paul Sartre termed “condemned to be free.”  Free will is a part of human existence; though, free will is subject to much debate, mostly running along the lines of either how mysterious free will is, or how absurd free will is.  Either way we seem to be stuck with free will, however ironic that maybe.  Of course, you run across the occasional person who doesn’t believe in free will.  Though, apparently, they are forced to believe this, so don’t be too hard on them.  Some days it’s difficult to be complicated dirt, especially when another mistakes us for human!

The Jesus graphic is modified from the famous Sacred Heart painting that will be recognized by many, particularly those who are Roman Catholic.  Please note that the inscription on Jesus’ heart, “Greed is God,” is a slight takeoff on the proverbial “greed is good.”  While this is technically a pun, the root word for God and good are so close that it barely counts.  Hopefully, this elicits what I would consider a simple definition of God which would be that which is of the good.  This doesn’t necessarily require a traditional view of God, but may provide some common ground between more traditionally religious people and those who have trouble with the word or concept of God.  I hope that those readers who are more traditionally religious will not find my parodying of Jesus offensive.  My parodies are actually intended to cut through the bull shit of what passes for conventional wisdom, morality, or religious truth these days, and reveal the seed of truth that is often overlooked or under-appreciated.  I think Jesus would approve.  Any honest reading of what words are attributed to Jesus, and you have to admit that Jesus had a sense of humor.  For those of you who aren’t really big on God, I hope that these Jesus parodies make some truths more accessible.

We can’t afford the free market!  The free market is the bane of Western Civilization and the nadir of scientific reductionism.

So, until next Sunday, with the next edition of Free Market Jesus, talk amongst yourselves or let me know what you think.